Are You A Love Worrier?

Excessive caution destroys the soul and the heart, 
because living is an act of courage, and an act of courage is always
 an act of love.  Manuscript Found in Accra - Paulo Coelho
 

Do you use your worry as the blade of ‘responsibility for them’ in the battle to protect the ones you love from your worst fears?

Do you honestly think and feel that if you do not worry then your love is diminished?

Do you say to yourself and others ‘I only worry because I love and care for her/him/them so much’?

Do you judge others by thinking that if they don’t worry they can’t love as much or as well as you do?

Do you know that if you don’t worry for them then some harm may befall your loved one/s?

Do you know that if you don’t fight their corner with your blade of worry then they will suffer in some way?

If you have answered ‘yes’ to any of those then you are a love worrier.

Love and fear are the opposite ends of the spectrum of emotions.  When we worry we are near the fear end and there will be a fear underlying our worry.  When we are being Love Worriers it is usually to do with keeping the people we love or care about safe with our worry; we make their safety, wellness, sobriety, solvency or whatever our responsibility.

BUT……

Fear is a dependency and when we worry about a loved one then we are depending on them to actually keep US safe from loss or pain; or we worry and enlist others to uphold our worry and do the blade running for us but in doing so keep US safe.  This actually dis-empowers the very person we are trying to help as well as ourselves.  We hold them in our energy of fear which can become a rut forever going round and round and round until it becomes the self-prophecy of doom, pain and loss.

Example:

When we worry about  a loved one who is driving to their home away from us and we say

‘Please phone or text me to let me know you’ve arrived,(said or unsaid –  ‘I won’t settle till I know you are safely home’).’

what we are actually saying is

‘I don’t trust you to stay safe’.

We may justify it by saying it’s not him/her but the others on the road who could be a danger but ultimately it is us that we want to keep safe from having to experience the pain or loss from them not staying safe.  If we have made sure they know how to drive and to know all the safety issues that they may need in an emergency then we have done our job.  When we can let go of the worry and let them know that we trust them to do what is right, and know that they will be safe, then they are free to be safe and not led by our fear.

‘Have a good drive home, speak to you soon, I love you.’

What would that feel like to hear compared to the first?  It is empowering: it is saying I trust you to look after yourself and I love you, be free.

 And in that moment of surrendering your worry you become

A Love Warrior.  How sweet and joyous is that?

A quick word about worry in general

Worry in itself, about ourselves or something we need to do, has a good reason to be in our awareness.  It causes action of some kind and if we create a worry list then worry becomes a thing that is transient at most.

 A worry list is a list of worries in three catergories –

1.       Things I’m worried about that I can do something about right NOW = end of worry.  E.G. I have to write a difficult letter and I can do it right now and cross it off the list.

2.       Things that I’m worrying about that need doing at a date in the future = STOP worrying NOW and in the future put it into list 1.  E.G. I have to write a difficult letter next month, I will stop worrying now and when the time comes I will put it in list 1 and write the letter immediately.

3.       Things I’m worrying about that I have no power to change myself = STOP and send universal love and healing to the situation.  E.G. Radioactive contamination from Japan is going to travel through the ocean and poison us all, send love and healing to Japan and the ocean.

Number 1  you do right now and then the worry has gone.

Number 2  you stop worrying until the the ‘thing’ moves to number 1 and then you do whatever is needed and the worry has no place to be.

Number 3  is to do with issues outside of yourself that you have no power over at all such as what  other people do or their issues, world issues of war, famine, ecology, financial institutions etc.etc.  In the moment that worry arises in this category let it go immediately and send love/healing/light or just plain good thoughts of happiness for an outcome that is of benefit to all.

Worrying is not love or care or helpful when it lasts for more than a moment or two.  Be kind to yourself and let go of being a worrier and if you happen to be one of those people who are happiest when you are worrying then ….. be happy.

My love to you all.

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God, Life’s Purpose, Floods and the Bible……

Yesterday two Jehovah’s Witness men came to my door asking if I believed in God, did I think we were here for a purpose and how I viewed the Bible?  The man who was doing the speaking also went on to ask how I felt about the floods on the news and seemed far more interested in what he needed to convey than my answers to his questions.  I was unable to discuss this with them to any great extent as I had visitors already in my home.  My answers to those four questions on the day were –

  •   Yes I believe in God or whatever other word anyone may wish to call that energy that is greater than the sum of ‘all that is’ and which we are all part of; just as an individual grain of sand is part of a beach or an individual crumb is part of a cake.  God is not out there but within us and everything.
  •   I believe that my purpose is to remember that Love is all we need; that each of us is part of the Divine Love that is God, The Creator, The Universe, Jehovah ……….; that when we share from a place of love then great joy and peace can be found.
  •  The Bible is a story book, one of the many voices of Universal Wisdom and because of much translation probably does not convey the complete accuracy of the authors’/creators’ intention.
  • I do not watch news programmes or read newspapers generally as I choose not to invite negativity into my experience.  If and when I am aware of disasters, natural or manmade, war or illness then I choose to open my heart and send love to all experiencing suffering and hardship as well as any perpetrators.  That way I am not adding to their suffering with my tears, pain, frustration or anger.

These answers were out of necessity short but what was interesting was the reactions of the two men.  The elder of the two men who had his arms around a young boy of about six or seven smiled, gave me eye contact the whole time and nodded and said that I seemed happy with my life whereas the other man was intent on giving his message via the pages in his pamphlet and gave me short bursts of eye contact in between choosing his next page/leaflet to show me.  The man with the ‘message’ asked if he could come back and discuss the Bible with me another time.  I said I would be delighted which I think took him aback but I will wait and see if he returns.

I was 14 years old when I decided that organised religion was too narrow for me.  What I have chosen after many hours of meditation and soul searching is to be at peace with where I am and also where others are too.

Remembering never ends and is a constant adventure.

What I have remembered will serve me well if this man returns with his Bible for we are all connected and can work together in this human experience.  Many times in our history and in modern times wars have been fought because there are different beliefs and religious fervours separating us from each other.  This is not how this world is meant to be. 

I can only show what I know by being the Love I remember and  helping others feel my acceptance of where they are in their remembering.  This does not mean I will not discuss my own beliefs just that I will choose not to preach it as the right way and make others’ the wrong way because that is where separation surely holds us in its grip.

So I will accept and love the Jehovah’s Witness as my soul brother and I will pray that he always has peace in his heart and understands that separation by whatever means is the manmade dis-ease of this world of unity. 

I send my love to you all ♥♥♥

Did you know………?

You don’t have to be great to get started

but you have to get started to be great.

  • Each of us is perfect, none of us is broken, no-one needs fixing, we are all enlightened beings.

I will keep telling you that you are deserving, loving, important, intelligent, worthy, compassionate, beautiful, creative, strong, brave, true and inspiring until you finally know it for yourself.

  • Life here as a human is a Soul choice to experience contrast not separation.

To remember who you are you need to forget who everyone has ever told you to be.

  • Life is a journey, constantly moving forward into expansion.

How would your life change if you decided you didn’t need fixing?

  • The destination is not necessarily important, the way we feel on the way is.

If you’re waiting for a sign, this is IT.

  • If we do what we love in every area of our life the journey is happy and joyful.

Do more of what makes you happy every day.

  • Being aware, conscious, awake, and enlightened are all states of mind and body that describe being on a deliberate journey.

“The intellect has little to do on the journey to discovery.  There comes a leap in consciousness, call it intuition or what you will, the solution comes to you and you don’t know how or why.”  Albert Einstein

  • Every moment of every day we are actively creating what is showing up in our lives. 

Your inner voice will either become a loving friend or your worst enemy….you decide.

  • NOTHING happens or shows up without our choosing it….

Everything you need will show up at the perfect time.

  • …… when negative things show up it is to remind us of the contrast we are here to experience.

Forgive our self for not knowing what we didn’t know before we learned it.

  • The contrast between things that we see helps us to know what we want.

Believe you can and you’re halfway there.

  • When we choose our thoughts deliberately and with awareness our lives will change for the better.

When patterns are broken, new worlds emerge.

Universal Law

When we are individually happy, joyful and at peace we contribute the greatest gift to this planet, humanity and ourselves.

Universal Law is working perfectly in all our lives. It is the way of energy flow and, as Einstein proved all those years ago, everything is energy in constant movement or vibration allowing it to be seen or felt dependent on the rate of vibration.

The misconception often is that it (Law of Attraction) only relates to positives.

Whatever the energy of our thoughts, words and deeds will determine what we attract whether they are negatives or positives.  We are totally responsible for what we see and experience in our own individual world.

When we completely understand that Universal Law and learn how to use it to our advantage, it is the beginning of our journey to personal awareness and consciousness.

It is only then that we can become creative in our desires, always remembering that the Universe supports those desires that are for the ultimate ‘good of all’.

When more negative things happen or are experienced we can learn to look inside and see what thoughts of lack we may have been thinking that created it.  These are usually ‘back stories’ that our mind subconsciously repeats.

The contrast that we will always experience here is just that – no-one is doing bad things per se – we need those ‘less than’ experiences so that we can choose what we want more wisely.

When we can learn to experience the difficult times as sign posts which show us where our thinking has gone ‘off track’ we find we can no longer blame.  We find compassion for the situation that has shown us the way.  We can forgive ourselves for not deliberately thinking, and that is the power of personal realisation and true peace of mind.

When we are individually happy, joyful and at peace we contribute the greatest gift to this planet, humanity and ourselves.